Guest Blogger Metta1313!

March 10, 2010

Please welcome our guest blogger today – Metta1313 from 365 days of 30+ Mommyhood. I am just head over heels excited that she agreed to write up a little number for my blog. Metta is one of my favorite mommy bloggers, and on top of that, she’s an Office fan. Which is amazing – since that is the best show evah. So win/win. Win. I think she’s one of the best bloggers around, and I know you will too. Enjoy!

When Diana asked me to guest blog for her, I racked my brain as to what her readers would enjoy. I mean, Diana is a pretty funny chick and she’s also a green loving momma. I think I’m sort of funny, though my husband likes to remind me at times of my funny being broken, and I’m sort of green, but am not as committed to it as Diana is. So alas, I lean towards the funny thing in the hopes her readers will be entertained at my attempts of being funny/talking about funny things. (Oh geez…did I just set myself up for failure? Let’s just call this a “talking about funny things” one.)
So here’s the deal. I’m a big Office fan. It took me a while to really get into the show, but once I was, I was hooked!
But then the inevitable happened. Grey’s Anatomy, another show I heart, was on at the same time, and the Office was neglected. But alas, Pam and Jim were having their baby last week. So we started Abby’s bath early and had her down for the night by 9:05pm and was able to watch. And you know what I did? I laughed my butt off! I mean like laugh so hard your sides hurt and b/c I’m only 4 months post pregnancy, it was also a laugh so hard a little pee comes trickling out. (And laughs like use usually happen b/c of the truth behind the comedy.)
Thank goodness for this show! Finally some big wig TV writers have the balls to show the world that having a baby and taking her home is not just some waving of a magic wand and you figure everything out right away. So here’s a list of the parts of the show I heart’ed(ßis that a word?) b/c of the brutal honesty of things:
1. The laboring:
Pam was in denial about the whole laboring thing. She was convinced that she was not ready…that “today was not going to be the day.” All the while, Jim was panicking. So this was kind of a reverse for me. I knew it was time to go to the hospital, but my husband was for sure that it wasn’t. (I was one of the lucky one’s whose labor progressed super quick…8.5 hours from start to finish sans epi b/c of said quickness.) But what I could totally relate to was the denial thing. I mean you carry your baby around for 40 weeks, and you are all excited, but once the real contractions start coming, you freak b/c you don’t fully think you are ready to take on this extraordinary endeavor of raising a child, let alone making it through labor.
2. The swaddling:
So like all new expecting parents, we took a birthing class and were instructed on how to swaddle, but I just couldn’t get it to work on the fake baby. How the hell was I going to get it to work on a squirming, crying baby? So the scene where Jim and Pam are trying to swaddle Cecilia just cracked me up! They both fidgeted their way through it and didn’t manage any success with it. (Oh the memories this brings me back to!)

Swaddling is such an art form. It really takes a ton of practice to get it to work. And fortunately, or really unfortunately for us, b/c Abby had to spend the first 10 days in the hospital (one day I will blog about this experience) we had 10 days of watching the nurses swaddling her. Though my hubby and I never conversed about this, we both feverishly watched each and every nurse do this…their techniques seemed slightly different, but the results were all the same…a tight swaddle to calm a screaming baby. My husband figured it out first and b/c I was just so nervous about everything, I was always asking him to do it. (Once we were home, though, I was able to get a handle on it.)
3. The nurse’s reactions:
I mean when she said to Pam something like, “Oh, so you are one of the ones who knows everything,” when Pam tried to tell the nurse not to give the baby a bottle in the nursery b/c of nipple confusion, the look on the nurse’s face when she turned to the camera was priceless. And the way Pam and Jim were oblivious to the look makes me wonder what kind of looks the nurses gave us when we were in the hospital. We had no clue what we were doing and I’m sure we looked a mess at times…especially with living at a children’s hospital for 10 days…showering every other day…waddling around in my slippers b/c of the post delivery fun times of swelling feet…maneuvering around all the thingies they had attached to Abby. It had to be comical…right?
4. The nursing:
Nursing is freaking hard work! And the scene where Pam and Jim have to share a room with another new mommy and the looks on their faces when they see the other mom nursing her baby with such ease was another priceless moment! It was like Pam and Jim where the real life people watching a movie happening right next to them where others make this whole newborn thing seem so freaking easy.
And when the lactation consultant comes to help them and turned out to be a dude, my mouth just opened so far to gasp in amazement. (This show was about to get even funnier, if that was at all possible.) The looks on Jim’s face…well again…priceless! It made me think how my hubby would have reacted if our lactation consultant was a dude. I mean he was totally fine with all the chicks that helped us out, but a dude…hmmmm…I don’t even know if I could have dealt with that one. But to make comedy, Pam went right along with it.

And when Pam decided to try to breastfeed Cecilia while waiting for Jim to pull the car around, and she latches on and feeds successfully, the joy in Pam’s eyes is so right on. The first time Abby latched on and finally breast fed, I just about cried b/c we had a long 4-week ordeal of feeding tubes and bottles before Abby and I successfully worked together.
…So if you managed to read this far, I’m not so sure if my funny was working or broken for this post, but well, talking about something funny I think I managed to do alright…
…And there is one more thing I have to bring your attention to. There is the Halpert Baby Blog. (But shhhhh…don’t tell NBC about topbabyblogs or topmommyblogs b/c there would be no contest if they were a part of it.)

Visit Metta at her blog –

And tomorrow – we have Lindsay from Waking Up Williams guest blogging on a baby massacre. That’s right. You might want to come on back to find out what on earth she’s talking about.

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