• On Being Angry

    September 24, 2012

    As time passes, I tend to get angrier at past events that didn’t really faze me before all this. I guess I’m in a new stage of grief. I’m not angry that the boys are gone – that’s still so painful to think about. I’m angry at the way it all happened. How I was…

  • Not Really a Baby. Just to Make it Clear.

    September 19, 2012

    Today I picked up the boy’s death certificates. Oddly, it was an afterthought on the way home from Bella’s play therapy. We go past it and I suddenly remembered Sam telling me they had called to say they were ready for us. I told Bella we were grabbing papers, headed in for them, and explained…

  • Embracing What I Never Wanted

    September 10, 2012

    Sometimes I wonder if there are really people that exist or have existed and never faced any type of traumatic loss. It’s not an angry or jealous thought, it’s simply there. I thought I might be one of those people, but in the back of my mind I was always waiting for the tragedy in…

  • Whew.

    September 7, 2012

    ::collapses on blog:: Y’all. I have had a BUSY week. Fun, but busy. Let me tell you – the thought of getting a puppy so Bella had a playmate? BWAHAHAHAHAHA ::gasps for air:: Lord have mercy, that thought was ridiculous. More like we just got a second kid – not quite but close. Don’t get…

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