Do you ever feel as if a piece of you belongs somewhere else? Not heaven. But here. On earth. As part of it but not as human. It’s hard to explain. I’ve felt this way about certain things since I can remember. It always has to do with nature. My parents driving cross country at…
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Rwanda {The First Part}
ContinueI stood under a small, concrete gazebo in east Africa and watched the rain pour down all around me. I took a deep breath and looked out at le pays des mille collines (the land of a thousand hills) – Rwanda. It had been 8 years but I’d made it back to one of the…
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The Piece of Me I Let Go
ContinuePicture of me in Rwanda on a safari, 2022 I stopped blogging because I couldn’t write about it all anymore. There was too much. I was too overwhelmed. Bella was too old. Everything felt too broken. My blog started as something about me, as a mama floundering through sleepless nights, rough pregnancies, and then unimaginable…
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A Decade of Pondering
ContinueThey would have been 10 last month. Preston and Julian. A decade old. Probably 5th grade. I wonder if they would have decided to switch places at school some days. Or if I would have ever gotten them confused – like when I get mad at Bella or Char and call them the wrong name…
{About Me}
Sam and I have been married since I was 19. He was 20. He's an OIF, medically retired veteran of the Army and Marines. We have 5 children - Bella was born in 2009 after a rather bumpy pregnancy and her first year was mostly crazy reflux. Preston and Julian, my identical twins, were born at 20 weeks in 2012 and lived only a few hours. Kaden was born full term in 2013 seemingly perfect, and at 4 days old he was found to have cardiomyopathy due to ciHHV-6. He passed away at 3 weeks old. Charlotte was born in 2015, and was a complete surprise to us. Each of them have changed our lives completely.
Currently I'm in school to become a counselor who focuses on trauma and grief.
I love Jesus - even though sometimes I get really angry and upset at the way our life has gone. I hope through my faults, insecurities, snarkiness, selfish nature, and general mess - my love for Christ and His work in my life shines through in my story.
{Recent Posts}
{Writing on}
