The Playdate and The Sweater

September 13, 2010

I posted on going to a playdate a while back, and told you all how I was debating going or not. Well, I did, and I’m so glad you guys convinced me to.

However, nothing ever goes smoothly with me – so here’s what happened.

The playdate was at 4pm. Google said the home it was being hosted at was about 15 minutes away. At 1pm, I suddenly remember I have no clean pants or shirts.

At 2pm I realize this again. I have no idea what happened between those times. I think I did my hair.

2:30. I begin to look in my closet for ideas. I try on 5 different shirts, and throw each one of them on the bed with growing anger as I realize I looked like the Goodyear blimp in all of them. It’s 75 degrees out, but I have no short sleeves. So I put on a long sleeved shirt.

Actually…sweater. :/ It is my favorite and hides my rolls nicely.

2:45. Sweating a little, I begin to search for pants. Que anger. Again, nothing fits. I lay on the bed in my underpants and sweater and began to panic. What would I do? Everyone was going to wonder why I was so porky and attending the Healthy Moms playdate.

3:00. Bella wakes from her nap in cranky mode. I realize that she too must be dressed. I rummage through her closet and put her in an adorable outfit with socks and shoes. I have had run in’s with her being barefoot before and didn’t want to hear it.

3:20. Freaking out. Why didn’t I lay out clothes the night before? Why didn’t I wash anything? I consider going in a dress, and then start laughing. I finally find pants with moderate food stains from Bella and take a washcloth to them in the bathroom.

3:30. Almost time to go. I’ve made myself sick over wearing this stupid long sleeved shirt sweater. I’ve rehearsed saying in my head, “Gosh, it was so much colder where I am than up here!” I can’t find my flip flops and have to wear sneakers, adding to the overdressed effect.

3:40. Bella, me, the giant diaper bag and my sweater all fit in to the car. I head out (dying but cranking up the air conditioning).

4:00. I pull up to a rather massive home in a neighborhood that looks like a scene out of Desperate Housewives and say a silent prayer that they will like me despite the sweater and my lack of playdate knowledge. They’ll love Bella (everyone does) so her prayers selfishly go for me.

Playdate goes well. I am not asked about the sweater, although I do make a comment on the weather (to discourage anyone thinking I am a moron). 🙂 All the moms wear shorts or jeans, sandals, and tank tops/short sleeves. I look like I might be heading to the Arctic after the playdate.

Bella is the only child with shoes and socks (naturally), so off they go as soon as I can grab her. She’s headed to the Arctic too so…

While there, one of the moms says that her friend has already submitted a letter of intent to her child’s kindergarten, ensuring they will hold a place for him. The kid is 4 months old. Her friend is trying to convince her that if she doesn’t do this for her 10 month old daughter, her child will never be able to attend a good college.

I throw up a little in my mouth. I think everyone else did too. The mom telling the story is clearly still in shock by this. I really liked her.

Bella had a blast, and the other moms were wonderful. The kids were all between 9-11 months so everyone was on the same page physically and mentally. It made for a really fun afternoon.

I got home, removed the sweater, and swore that next time, I would be a heck of a lot more casual. I also joined two more groups and found a baby gym we’ll be going to during the week.

As for the Arctic, it was too expensive. And you have to have more than a long sleeved shirt to survive there. Who knew I’d be under dressed for something?


  • themanager

    September 14, 2010 at 5:38 am

    i’m so happy you ended up going. all the events leading up to leave sound like a story out of my own getting ready to do anything journals. nothing fits, or looks right but my kids are always well dressed and clean 🙂

  • Ellie

    September 13, 2010 at 11:28 pm

    All too often I think about joining a mothers group and then I get way too worried about what I should wear or if I’ll get along with anyone. Your story makes me want to take the plunge. Thanks ^__^

  • Alexia

    September 13, 2010 at 9:29 pm

    Ha ha ha!! You crack me up Diana! The way I look at it is at least you showed up in clean clothes! So glad you got up the courage and pushed away all of the doubts and questions and went for it. You’ve inspired me to try to get back involved in the Mom’s groups, there’s no excuse to not have any friends in my town just cause I’m too timid or shy to make them. And thanks to your lesson I will be sure to plan the outfit the night before ; )

  • Mother May I

    September 13, 2010 at 7:13 pm

    It’s amazing how we all seem to be on the same page about things – and yet we all still worry about them! I’m sure it was nice to meet other moms in your area. Sounds like Bella had a great time too!

  • *Jenni*

    September 13, 2010 at 5:18 pm

    I feel the same way and have always wondered if anyone else did! What a fun story to read.

    New follower 😉

  • Siva

    September 13, 2010 at 1:33 pm

    Happy to hear you went and had a lovely time. Sweater aside. 🙂

    So interested in the Weight Watchers thing as well! Would you need to have a blog to participate?

    1. Diana

      September 13, 2010 at 5:22 pm

      You probably would – I’m not sure yet. Still in the planning process of it all. I’ll try my best to work out something that works for a wide variety of people!

  • Jess@Straight Talk

    September 13, 2010 at 1:27 pm

    I’m so glad you went!! Good for you!

  • Angie

    September 13, 2010 at 10:37 am

    I’m so glad that you went, and had a great time! I hope this group of moms becomes part of your new community in your new town.
    Your story about the mom putting her kid on the wait list for kindergarten at 4 mos made me laugh. She sounds like one of those competitive neurotic first-time moms who obsessively records her kid’s developmental milestones and takes great pride in it being ahead of the curve. I know this kind of mom because I was one! Then my second came along and was totally different than the first, and the first started to be a bit less of an angel than I had originally believed, and I figured out that they are who they are, simultaneously perfect and flawed and that they develop at their own pace, and I relaxed a little. I sure hope that mom will too.

    In the meantime, I hope your new group of friends are as wonderful as you are!

    1. Diana

      September 13, 2010 at 10:58 am

      Thanks Angie.

      I’m somewhat like that mom too – with Bella as my first everything has to be obsessively monitored and carefully thought out. I can see how you can wonder about the “right” kindergarten even this early if everyone else is.

      However, as I go along, things are beginning to be put a little more into perspective. I hope by #2 I’ll have it down.

      Well, at least under control a little more. 🙂

  • Better Than 1

    September 13, 2010 at 10:29 am

    Hopefully you’ll post on them, as well as your nanny interviews? Love those.

    Also, I remember you tweeting on a Weight Watchers blog thing? Are you still thinking of doing that because I would be interested in joining up with you. (Since you brought up about not fitting into much these days – not because I think you’re a porker lol).


    1. Diana

      September 13, 2010 at 10:47 am

      LOL. Well…

      Yeah, I’m still trying to get it figured out. I’ll do a post on it if I can get something that seems reasonable and a lot of interest.

  • Amy

    September 13, 2010 at 10:15 am

    Good for you for going. I have a hard time going to groups myself and always end up either over or under dressed.

  • Mrs. MidAtlantic

    September 13, 2010 at 9:24 am

    I’m really glad you went! I always get so nervous about things, only to get there and realize I was silly.

  • Momma Messies

    September 13, 2010 at 9:00 am

    Glad to know I’m not the only one who freaks out over what to wear to new playdates!

    I joined last year with my 2 boys and we’ve never been happier. I can’t tell you the community I’ve become a part of because of it. I’ve even started thinking of making my own.

  • Yoga Girl

    September 13, 2010 at 8:49 am

    This had me ROFL! Imagining you in the sweater and underpants racing around trying to figure out what to do.

    Playdates can be tough. I’ve been to a few that had really judgemental moms, but I just didn’t go back. Most of them are great. Friends, fun, and your baby gets to interact with kids her own age.

    Hoping you’ll keep us updated on how the others go too!

  • Staci

    September 13, 2010 at 8:41 am

    LOL. So true – I worry so much about what everyone is going to think. I’m so glad you had a good time!

  • Elizabeth

    September 13, 2010 at 7:16 am

    good for you for going! don’t worry about what you wear, everyone usually has the same anxieties and they’re all more worried about themselves than they are about you – at least I hope this is true because I take comfort in it.

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