I Googled our nanny – and then I read her blog

January 26, 2011

We’re interviewing a nanny this Friday. (Read here if you want to know why) When I was a nanny, I googled the heck out of every.single.family that I went to meet. Before and after meeting them. You know, since it would have been a little odd to be all, “Oh yeah, can Iย run a background check on you and your wife,ย Mr. Smith?”

So naturally I googled the person who we are meeting to watch Bella.

And I found her blog.

It’s a sweet mommy blog, with pics of her kids and a updates on trips and things they do as a family. I was reading through it when suddenly I stopped and thought, “Is this wrong?”

I got a really weird feeling; like I’d poked around in her room, found her diary, and read it.

She’s the perfect candidate for what we need – a nurse,ย flexible on days, not looking for a whole lot of hours, 2 kids in between Bella’s age, and very smart and capable. She’s totally excited about having Bella added to the mix. Now it’s like I have some sort of a hidden nanny cam on her – and her life. I wish I hadn’t found it, because I don’t know that I won’t go on and read it again…

Part of me (the evil part) thinks that it’s great to know she has one, because I’ll know what Bella does there. I won’t have to worry or wonder if I’m hearing what really happened.

And part of me thinks I should mention something about blogging to her and just get it out in the open. Because she could find mine. Maybe not by googling me but she could stumble across it and know by the pics. I’d want to know if she did.

Then the other part (I’m made up of many parts) thinks that it’s not really a big deal. She updates on her life and that’s about it – so it’s not likely she’ll suddenly freak out about my kid on there one day for her family to read.

So…let’s hear it. If you found it (just pretend you’re all neurotic like me and Googled your nanny candidate, ok?) would you keep reading? Stop? Mention it? Mention your own?

36 Comments

  • We decided. And who we won’t be hiring. |

    January 31, 2011 at 7:21 pm

    […] for those of you that asked – no, I didn’t mention I read her blog. We ended up deciding that, had we hired her, we would have included a privacy clause saying she […]

  • GuiltySquid

    January 29, 2011 at 8:09 pm

    I don’t think I’d say anything, but that’s mostly because I wouldn’t want her to feel like she’d have to censor herself based on my reading it/not reading it.

    Unless she brings it up, I wouldn’t say anything.

  • kim

    January 27, 2011 at 2:04 pm

    well, she used her full name, so she should expect it. But I’d let her know, for honesty’s sake. So that at some point she doesn’t figure out that you are are a blogger or find you and then it’s all, ‘hey?’

  • Krista

    January 27, 2011 at 9:48 am

    I’d keep reading it, but mostly because I’m nosy and I wouldn’t be able to stop. I could see how it could get awkward though. Especially if she ever writes about your kid. That would be a no go for me. I can write about my kid, but someone else – no. (see, I’m nuts.) So in some ways I think the fair thing to do would be to stop, but I wouldn’t.
    Was that nice & helpful? haha!

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:31 pm

      LOL. I read this and was like – it’s me. I don’t think I could stop either. I mean, I could if we didn’t go any further than tomorrow’s interview. But if we hired her.

      It’s ON.

  • Michelle

    January 27, 2011 at 9:41 am

    This post reminds me of me in so many ways! It’s such a weird place to be in – wondering if you’re “spying” (or just peeking into someone’s personal life.)

    On the one hand, it *is* public information.. my mother always said not to write anything down you wouldn’t want the whole world to know (and in this case, having a public blog is actually INVITING the whole world to know!) But, you don’t want to get caught in a situation where she could possibly blog about you/your daughter in a witty, joking way – you could take a bit of offense and THEN have to explain that you’d been reading it a while…

    That’s the situation I’d most want to avoid. I’d let her know that you came across her blog, she won’t think you’re crazy for googling, she has kids, there is NO way she wouldn’t have done the same.

    We live in a time where people are okay sharing information publically, so they shouldn’t mind if it’s found…. right?

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:30 pm

      I hope so! The part about her joking and me being offended and the wondering if I’ll slip and be all, “So your family in Texas” and she’s like ???

      Those are the parts that make me think, “Either quit reading or tell her you know.”

  • Michelle

    January 27, 2011 at 9:22 am

    I’m a nanny, a mom, and a blogger. Over time my boss and I have become friends and I know she reads my blog even though she never specifically mentions it. We’re Facebook friends and there is a link to my blog on my FB page. I would just say mention it so she knows you know.

    I guess I learned the hard way but I would expect that if she hasn’t yet she will find your blog and read it too. Lots of people read my blog who don’t necessairly comment or publically follow. I just expect everyone is reading it and just assume what I say there is basically public information.

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:28 pm

      Hola to a fellow nanny (and mom)! I think it’s pretty brave of you to blog and have a pretty good idea your boss reads it. I’ll have to pop over and take a look in a few.

  • LA@TheReelFamily

    January 27, 2011 at 9:01 am

    We are looking for a nanny well really a college student to babysit 3 days a week in the afternoon so I can rest since I throw up all the time. And I have googled and facebooked every.single.person. And I will go ahead and admit that I canceled one interview because I was appalled by the profile pic on facebook.

    Yes, I am the same way. Its your kid and whether you meant to or not “Momma Bear” comes out sometime. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:25 pm

      First – BIG ((((hugs)))) because OMG I know about barfing and I am SO sorry. ๐Ÿ™

      I’m happy to know from yours and other comments I’m not the only crazy one who does this. My concern would just be bringing it up. I mean, no matter what it’s an awkward conversation.

  • D

    January 27, 2011 at 8:19 am

    I kind of agree with Cole and yet it could get awkward if you say something. If you plan on reading her blog, then I’d say something. If you can let it go, then just pretend it never happened. I guess after you interview her and really feel her out, you can make that call. Geez I was no help here lol. Good luck ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:24 pm

      You helped – you chimed in and made a good point. I’d like to say I’d never read it again if we hired her.

      I’d also like to say that tomorrow I’m going to wake up 25lbs lighter.

      But both are lies. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Tweets that mention I Googled our nanny โ€“ and then I read her blog | — Topsy.com

    January 26, 2011 at 9:05 pm

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Diana, Diana. Diana said: Blogged: I Googled our nanny โ€“ and then I read her blog http://goo.gl/fb/AClnZ […]

  • Jen

    January 26, 2011 at 8:50 pm

    So here is my take on it. I dont think there is anything wrong with you googling someone who may potentially work for you. Businesses do background checks, this is less severe, but its your child, not just someone working on earrings for you. I would do everything I could to find out everything I could about a potential employee. I wouldn’t say anything unless you are going to hire her, then after maybe bring up your blog and say something along the lines of I ran across yours, and compliment it or something. Honestly, like others have said if its a public blog its pretty much a free for all, its not a diary unless its private! ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:22 pm

      I’m leaning towards bringing it up if we hire her. I really am.

  • Jen

    January 26, 2011 at 8:30 pm

    Do you have any concerns about her blogging about your daughter? That is maybe the only reason I would bring it up (if you didn’t want her to post pics of her kids with your daughter in it to etc etc).

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:21 pm

      Yes. Big concerns – but really for anyone. Like I’d be freaked that someone might put info/pics of her on a FB page, so blogger or not I have the same feelings. Someone suggested a privacy clause in our contract. I might add that in.

  • Cindy @ This Adventure, Our Life

    January 26, 2011 at 7:17 pm

    I do not think you need to bring it up. When you put a blog out there, it is out there for the world, not just you. So, with that said, she can find you and you her. If you are taking care of someone else’s children you can not expect to NOT be googled, facebooked, etc… So, I am sure she may know or not. If she is a honest and good person she should not care if you read what she says. We all have bad days and good days, even the best of parents. I would probably have been like you and googled and read, just my personality.

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:16 pm

      Good to know it’s not just me that does this. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Cathy

    January 26, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    It’s a blog online, you don’t put stuff online if you don’t want ppl to see. It’s fair game! I’d wait a bit though to tell her, till after she is hired! Lol

  • melissa

    January 26, 2011 at 5:44 pm

    If its a public blog, then there’s no issue. And if she’s a mother as well she would understand your research I would hope.

  • Cole

    January 26, 2011 at 5:34 pm

    I seem to be in the minority, but I would tell her; I don’t think it’s weird at all to Google her – and her blog is on the Internet, not in a Hello Kitty locked notebook under her mattress – but I think it’s a little dishonest if you don’t say anything, and it may be awkward if she finds out later (if you accidentally mention something you read there or something). Just my $0.02

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:15 pm

      I don’t want to be dishonest, but that’s how it feels. You know? On the other hand, I hate to make her start to censor what she writes.

      I see your point – because that’s how I feel about it. *sigh*

  • Eileen @ Bringing Up Bronwyn

    January 26, 2011 at 5:19 pm

    I wouldn’t say anything, unless it became an issue. Although she might figure it out if she tracks IP addresses or anything.

  • Melisa

    January 26, 2011 at 5:05 pm

    I’d keep reading it and not tell her. Heck, she may decide to tell you about it. Esp if she does mention your child in it or decides to post pictures of Bella. I’d see if it comes up and if she does mention hers, you should then mention yours. I agree with not wanting her to censor herself. And if you found her blog by Googling than I’m sure she’s okay with whose reading!

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:05 pm

      See – you hit the nail on the head. It’s the pics of Bella thing. I don’t want my kids pics online anywhere but where I put them. I know someone can take them from FB or even here, but’s its different.

      Someone on FB suggested a privacy clause for that in our contract.

      1. Melisa

        January 29, 2011 at 8:43 am

        I think the privacy clause is a great idea!

  • Alena

    January 26, 2011 at 5:05 pm

    My vote don’t say. If she starts to not like the gig anymore she may say something there before telling you. And do you really want someone watching your kid that doesn’t really want to?

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:03 pm

      No. I really don’t. You’re right, and that’s what makes me want to not say anything. That and making her uncomfortable.

  • Summer Davis

    January 26, 2011 at 5:04 pm

    Call me crazy but I think Googling people is kind of an expected thing these days. I think people Google EVERYONE new in their lives. OMG. Or is it just me? Am I a stalker?

    Maybe not within the first 5 minutes of the interview, but I’d let her know (laughingly) that you “ran across” her blog and that you think she’s a great candidate, IF your interview reveals such revelations. Feel her out. If she’s got a sense of humor, I’m sure she won’t be weirded out. Like I said, I think it’s kind of expected these days.

    Call me cray-zay.

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:03 pm

      Well, if you’re crazy then what on earth am I? :p I like the wait and see approach you’re recommending.

  • LCW

    January 26, 2011 at 5:03 pm

    I wouldn’t say anything…my former employer found my blog and emailed me about it…nothing bad, just awkward and honestly I wish I didn’t know he read it.

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:02 pm

      I was wondering what you would say to this. If I had been a blogger while nannying, I would have felt the same way. And yet, had it ever slipped into a conversation I would have felt really strange they never told me.

  • twistedxtian

    January 26, 2011 at 5:01 pm

    I’d keep reading. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I’d be torn on telling her about it though. I wouldn’t want her to think she has to censor herself because I’m reading it, but I would also feel like I was holding back something. And maybe one day something scandalous would come of it. (Yes, this is starting to sound like a cheesy movie.)

    Alright, so now I’m torn. I’d want to keep reading, especially since she sounds pretty cool and it’d be neat to see what she’d say about my child, but I’d also feel slightly bad for not saying anything… I don’t think anyone should have to censor themselves on their blog b/c they know a certain person is reading, and that’s what would drive me to not tell them, and maybe ultimately to stop reading.

    1. Diana

      January 27, 2011 at 8:00 pm

      I feel the same way, like if I tell her – then she’s obligated to change her writing up for me. Censor it. Which isn’t my intent.

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