Last night Sam was gone, having to work a 24 hour shift on “duty”. After watching The Bodyguard and getting all hot under the collar for Kevin Costner, then freaking out that someone was going to break into our home, I checked every door/window in the house to make sure nobody was waiting to murder us. (Does anyone else ever think they would die of a heart attack if a face appeared in a dark window?) Then I checked on Bella.
She woke up when I pulled her covers over her, looked at me with her big eyes, and I decided, “You know what? We’re going to snuggle tonight.”
I carried her, half asleep in my arms, to the bed, tucked her in next to me, and snuggled up beside her. I listened to her breathe and marveled at how big she had become. I thought of how fast almost 2 years had gone by, how much I missed her being tiny.
And then I started to cry. It was all gone so quick and before I knew it she’d be giving me giving me the finger and running up the stairs screaming, “I HATE you. You are the worst mother EVER!”
I just wasn’t ready for it.
As I lay there choking back sobs, she turned to face me, paci in her mouth. Her little hands reached out, took my face and patted it.
Then she stuck her finger up my nose, said delightedly, “Mama nose?” laughed till she choked, and had to be taken back to bed after repeating it twice more.
So I got the finger anyway. Just a few years early.